Red Galaxy
by i605i605
Summary: After knowing Shepard is still alive but in a coma, Kaidan began to write mails to him while they fixing the Normandy.
1. Chapter 1

2/3 Earth Time

* * *

From: Kaidan Alenko

Hey, Shepard,

I'm so happy that you are still alive. I know this may sound understated, but I don't know what else to say. You survived, Shepard, you are too lucky to even be called lucky. I can only say, this is a miracle.

Normandy crashed on a terrestrial planet, Liara told me it's called Rubitol, Ruby in English. Speaking of which, I can't help but remember the scenes when we fled from the solar system…Oh man, you should see that. The whole universe is glowing red. It is a beautiful scene, and not many has the chance to lay their eyes on it. I witnessed the end of this great war, but somehow, I'm not proud of it.

Nightmares have been hunting me ever since we landed here. I woke up in the midnight, finding no one to turn to. Sometimes I dreamed about my parents, sometimes the sudden darkness I fell into on Mars, but most of the time, I dreamed about you. There's a scene keeping showing up in my dream. I can see the piercing light from the beam, the bullets are falling from the sky, the rain, the blood…Watching you leaving me behind is the most painful moment in my life, and even more unbearable when I realized that this is forever. I know we are soldiers, we have duty on our shoulders. You were there saving the world from Reapers, but somehow I wished it wasn't you. Everybody can be on that mission, anybody, just not you. I know I'm being selfish, but I don't care if other people died or lived, Shepard, I just want YOU alive.

I'm the one who placed your name on that memorial wall, with my own hands. The coldness from stone cracked into my bones, I would never forget that feeling.

I couldn't fall back to sleep after the bad dreams last night, and I've been thinking a lot. I remember the _sanity check _back on Citadel. Oh god, I must have looked like an idiot. But to be honest, that's the bravest thing I have ever done in my life. I may looked like a fool, but I never regret it. Now I've got myself the best commander, alone with a living boyfriend. I'm done with holding back my feelings, since now that everyone have learnt about us.

Admiral Hackett said they have started the rebuilding program of Citadel and the Mass Relays, We are also trying to fix the Normandy. EDI went offline for several days but now Joke gets her back online. She and Samantha have been helping a lot. They do know the ship, don't they?

Shepard, your victory and survival give a hope to the whole Universe, and also to me. I know you won't be able to see this mail anytime soon, but I will wait for you, okay? If we are lucky enough to Normandy back on running, I will go to find you.

Thanks to god that you are still alive.

Kaidan

* * *

The ending of the Mass Effect 3 has torn me apart. They made such a perfect match! I still couldn't clam down weeks after play through the game, and can't help but crying every time I think about them. Hope writing these stories can bring me some peace.

There will be five mails and an afterstory. This is my first ME fanfic and also I am not a native-English speaker so there may be many mistakes in my fic, sorry about that.

If you like my work or want to discuss about the story, the game, or just the two of them, you are more than welcomed to reach me. Please leave your comments or criticism and enjoy this.


	2. Chapter 2

21/3 Earth Time

* * *

From: Kaidan Alenko

Hi Shepard,

Still remember the ring that you gave me? Back there I said I was afraid to lose it for there's a war to fight. But now? I think I can never live without it. It's really light though, I can barely feel it on my finger, but at the same time, it is really heavy, reminding me that there is someone I need to worry about. EDI told me your little story about the ring. Did you really said that she is as unique as this ring? Okay, honestly, I'm jealous.

The photo you placed in your house back in Citadel, you know, the group photo we took at the party, is no longer there I suppose. Thanks to EDI, I can still get a copy of it. Right now it is hanging over my bed. I would take it off every time I miss you. Can you believe it, this is actually the only photo of you (besides the one in your archive, it doesn't look like you) that I have. Maybe we were so busy fighting this war that we almost forgot the ordinary things that normal couples would do…

When I was going through your armoire today, I find your suit by accident (fine, maybe not THAT accident), the one you were wearing when we were on that undercover mission. I've got to say, you look HOT in that suit, ass burning hot! Yeah…I would simply pull you aside and make out with you if we were not on a mission. Also I found your yellow short jacket, which you didn't wear that much. You said yellow is not your color but trust me, it suits you just fine. Maybe you can wear it to me next time, wear only it.

Since the resources are limited here and I was too bothered to taking care of myself, I've been growing my hair after we landed. There, finally I said it. I didn't pay much attention to my hair as well so basically it's a big change. People around me have got used to it but I'm not so sure if you would be able to recognize me when you see me. I'm still taking time to make up my mind. Perhaps by the time we meet, they will be all gone.

I miss you Shepard. Hope your treatment continues to go well.

Kaidan


	3. Chapter 3

6/4 Earth Time

* * *

From: Kaidan Alenko

Commander, wondering where I am? Hmm…some hints maybe? I can see a large tank with only three fish in it. There is a chessboard across from the tank. I am currently lying on a bed with a set of stereo placed on the nightstand. Any clue?

Only if you haven't figured out where I am, sir, I am in your cabin, lying on your very own bed, naked, touching myself… Don't be surprised, I am voice typing this message. Oh god, I hope EDI isn't listening._ (I've heard everything, EDI out)_

Shepard, this is the bed where we did it for the first time, right? I can still smell you on those pillows…Mmm…your scent is turning me on, Commander. I want this to be more, you know that clearly.

I've lost six, maybe seven pounds ever since we made it here. It's hard to tell from the appearance but I do feel the agility. It feels good. And I've been looking for these weird, provocative, high-technical positions on datanet…you know what I mean, hopefully when you are fully recover, we can give it a try. I think there's a great chance that you might actually like it. _(Keywords: Head Over Heels, EDI out)_

Shepard… God, I dunno what I'm talking about…. I'm hard, Sir, so fucking hard… I need you, I need those lips, yeah, your tongue. Take it, just like the last time you did it, Hmm… That's right, use the tipoff your tongue, cover it with your slaver, and then you'll lick my ball _(balls, unless… EDI out)_...Mmm, I'm gonna call you Commander and you will call me Major, just like that…Is the Commander punishing his Major for misbehavior? Or it's the Major taking revenge on his dear Commander? I know you like it, don't you? Mmm, Shepard? You tell me which one you prefer? You want me to take vengeance on you, right? For what? Mmm…Leaving me behind? You're right, that does sound bad. I'll avenge you, and I will do it the _hard _way, Shepard…I'm gonna leave my seeds inside you, and you're gonna come for me! Uhhh-

...Whew...

Wait— I gotta clean the mess… Oh shit, how can I delete this…record? Get it… No…? Delete? Backward? Clean! Empty! Restore! Not working? …Dammit!

...

I still miss you, Shepard, so much. I just wish you could be here, lying in my arms. I want to touch your body, feel the muscles against my palms…Fuck! I want to fuck you one more time, for real. Or this time you can do it to me, I don't really mind.

Anyway…If you see this, write to me please? I miss you._ (We all miss you, Commander. EDI out)_

Kaidan Alenko, OVER


	4. Chapter 4

29/4 Earth Time

* * *

From: Kaidan Alenko

Hi, Shepard,

I'm so happy to tell you that the repairment of the Normandy is approaching to its end, Joker and EDI are working on the final test. The weapon system is still not working though, but at least it can take us home. We will paint her again after we get back. When you are aboard next time, she will be refreshed completely.

About the dog in cargo deck, KEI-9, I don't know if you still remember it, we are friends now. Basically every day I would take him for a walk around the Normandy. He reminds me of the good old days back on earth. I had a dog when I was little too, a real dog, one that will get sick, lose its hair and bark at the strangers. I know he is long gone by now, but every time I think about him, I thing about that happy time.

This planet looks just like earth. The same blue sky, the same muddy dirt. There are mountains and gullies, even the plants are also green. We haven't found any large organics so far but we set our perimeter in a small area around the ship. In a strange place like this, you can never be too careful.

I've told you that the L2 implant causes me migrant from time to time, right? Now guess what? has found this kind of Shrubby plants whose leaves can easy my migrant. I always take some leaves with me now. Yet we haven't figured out if there would be any side-effects but I guess nothing could go worse than the side-effects of my L2. Also I collected some seeds of the plants, maybe we could grow some when I get back to Citadel, or earth.

I've been thinking about this for a long time, though I didn't know your opinion. I want to take you to Canada, show you the place where I grew up, just like what we used to talk about. Sitting on the balcony, having some Whisky and good Canadian lager…I know we have been talking this a lot but we never get the chance. Now that the war is over, I think it's time for us to focus on…us. I'm sure my mother would love you, she would be so happy to see you, if she is still alive.

Shepard, a lot of things have happened in the past few months, but compared to the weeks of waiting, uncertainty and emptiness, it felt like nothing. I miss you, Commander. We used to be so busy fighting against the Reapers, exposing the lies of Illusive Man. The future was full of unknown. Now that everything is over, we can finally sit down to get our hands on the coming new life, can't we? I'm tossing alone in this double-bed, having the hardest time to sleep. I used to sleep alone though but now… Now everything is different, and I need you, more than ever.

Kaidan


	5. Chapter 5

14/5 Earth Time

* * *

From: Kaidan Alenko

Hey, Shepard, the savior of the galaxy,

If I remember right, you have been in coma for at least two months. Liara made a contact with your senior doctor and she said you would be awake in a few days. This is a good new, isn't it? The great Commander Shepard coming back from dead again, I mean…I've lost you once, Shepard, and I don't know if I can survive a second time.

Admiral Hackett said that the rebuilding of the Citadel is still going on, but now they are open for the settling applications. I was wondering maybe I should get us a new home? Your previous house Anderson gave you is pretty good but I don't think I can afford such a luxury one. And after the Final Battle, how much would remain?

I'm hearing rumors that the engineers are working on the beam, and the new council have decided to leave the Citadel in the solar system.

EDI asked me few questions about people in love after she questioned my sexualities, guess she would have been bother you around…but it also made me come to realize that maybe it's time for us to take this to the next level. I understand if you think this is too fast, but the timing is good. This is very serious, Shepard. I'm going to make decisions for the rest of my life over the fact that you will be by my side and be there for me. This is a huge decision, and I am ready. So think about it.

Also I've listed several things that I think we should try. Those are all normal stuff, you know…not a big deal. But I would be really happy if you agreed to do so. I think I will turn out to be a perfect husband? Okay, I know, too soon.

Oh right, a good news. If things are going smoothly, this maybe be the last night we spend on this planet. Tomorrow, Normandy will us home. You are behind the schedule, Shepard. Wait for me please. It will be the first thing after we got to the Citadel to check on you. Hope they are keeping you in the tank to let you heal, just like a mermaid.

I love you, forever

Kaidan


End file.
